Sometimes we don’t notice when we are getting attached…to
people, a concept, a place, a moment in time…all of the above. As we finished morning balcony coffee and
stretches, I felt a deep panic kicking in.
Returning to life on life’s terms…uncertainties, having to schedule each
other into our business, cold and drastic weather patterns all successfully
tamped down beneath present joys for over a week. 
The vague sense of loss was now exploding into full on visions of pulling into the farm in the cold winter rain or worse…returning home for the first time without Misha to greet us. The various aspects of grief that had been eating their way to the surface from somewhere in my subconscious finally burst out, triggered by someone accidentally throwing away my breakfast paleo muffins in the sprint to clear out the fridge. My sadness spilled over in a deep wellspring from tear ducts that had been forcefully stopped a week ago, subservient to the present joys of family, the wonders of the island, and Christmas. My devastation caught me by surprise.
As always, the sea had a quieting effect…And the ride to the
mainland found us once again in the here and now, 
about to take our land
vehicles to our go-to Holiday Inn… by a different and familiar old seaside…The
Sanibel Christmas Island Seaside.
After a lunch at one of our all time favorites, Grandma Dot's, where we feasted on award winning grouper and key lime pie, we spent our afternoon kayaking in the Tarpon Bay Estuary in the sun. Dave, weary from the long year behind us, took the time to sit on the hotel beach….which left me to kayak as Sarah’s partner. Eliott and I decided to trade places in the middle of the bay (awkward mental image here) switching me to the solo kayak and El to the Sarah one.
What
fun it is to ride…..(Island Christmas jingles here).
Back at Holiday Inn we took more couple’s
photos in the sunset and lounged at the pool until our evening Christmas meal
at the Mad Hatter.
Along with the
delicate flavors of roasted beets, kobe steaks, giant shrimp, crème brulee and
mousse au chocolat, we enjoyed the Hatter’s unconventional approach to decor:
photos from
Through the Looking Glass sketched with words from the book,
stained glass Alice and rabbit windows, and the upside down Christmas tree with
presents on ‘top’. 
As we left we took
in the night fire on the beach behind the restaurant where other quiet parties
were coming to an end, and the amazing spectacle of uniquely colored lights on
the main street that express a creative and lighthearted island approach to
Christmas… it must be like a fun day in the Kingdom. 
Island life with Father agrees with me. I think it agrees with everyone.
